Waterboarding is highly misunderstood

Waterboarding is getting a bad rap. Waterboarding needs to be "re-imaged" as the advertising world puts it.

See... in truth, waterboarding helps reverse global warming. There is entirely too much CO2 being emitted by the prisoners at Guantanamo. Who could argue with that? By injecting water, which is really high in oxygen content, up the noses of the offending emitters, the greenhouse emissions go down.

This is not just another wild claim by this blogger. It is a scientific fact.*

...

..

.

Please note that the picture above is only an artist's rendering and you should NOT attempt to waterboard any terrorist in the manner shown in the illustration. For example, it is highly recommended that you tie the terrorist down and also lose the necktie. Otherwise, just as sure as Michelle Obama and Sarah Palin were both born in 1964, the terrorist is going to reach out and squeeze your cojones until water runs out of your own eyes. This will make it EXTREMELY hard for you to concentrate on the task at hand - and concentration is key during waterboarding. Alternatively, the terrorist may use your necktie as a lever to bounce your forehead off the wooden platform repeatedly. This is also not recommended when concentration is important.

*Not to be construed as an actual scientific fact.**

**But the process was actually investigated and confirmed by Nobel Prize-winning researcher, Dr. Moumad al-Gore.***

***Not to be construed as an actual truthful statement.