NO BOND FOR AX KILLING SUSPECT
1. Please. He didn't kill an ax. Thank you.
2. People are not let out of jail on bond. They are let out of jail on BAIL. They may sometimes secure their bail with a BOND. Get it? He is not out on bond, nor was he refused bond. He was refused BAIL. Thank you.
3. While I am on the subject, the judge didn't ask him if he were guilty or innocent. He asked him if he were guilty or NOT guilty. And if the jury lets him off down the road, they will not be finding him INNOCENT. Get it? He will be found NOT GUILTY. Thank you.
4. ALSO while I am at it: he will not "bust" out of jail, nor was the police car's window "busted out." I don't even want to hear you say he was "busted" for the crime. Just get rid of "busted" from your vocabulary altogether. Or I will bust you in the mouth. You will go further as a crime reporter if you lose that word.
5. Finally, model prisoners are not called "trustees" just because they are trusted. I don't care what the sign on the Sheriff's Office wall says. Trustees are fiduciary people. Banks, for example. Not that you know what that word means either. Prisoners who work outside with little supervision are called TRUSTYS. Please write that down and also tell the Sheriff how to spell it.
I'm outta here.
Unless I turn to page 2.
